Coconuts

Its amazing how many coconuts (in Thailand they're green for some reason) you can transport on one boat! One large bow wave and this lots surly in the drink.

Yawn

A small fishing inlet near Hua Hin, where boats are moored up during the day before going out at night. I don't know why they only fish at night? Maby the fish like Thai men sleep during the day!

Buffalo Crap!

These guys are a fair way up, coating this building with buffalo crap or something similar. Just take a look at their high tech scaffolding! Damned twigs man, held together with grass! Whats all that about, its a good job your average Thai only weighs around 45 kgs fully clothed. I tiptoed past it fearful that a heavy foot fall would constitute mass murder.

Mass Suicide?

Not a Thai version of the 'jonestown suicides' but temple ladies having an afternoon siesta after some furious worshipping! White clothing is de rigeur as the chosen one demands it.

Dear God its horrific!

Right now pay attention! This centipede looks and is horrific. Ning thought it would be a wheeze to throw it on me (in the bag) Well I was up and out the door faster than a cartoon cat. These things are Dangerous with a capital 'D' although not deadly. A bite from it will have you in hospital for quite a while. They can grow up to 20 cm's long, this one was about 12 cm's long. It was suggested that it be removed from the bag for this photo. Not a chance in hell. It stayed in the bag and a good distance from the house until it was taken to an undisclosed location and dealt with. Made me feel quite nauseous. Look at its pointy bits!!!

Scared a chap half to death

I give you the 'Gecko' They are everywhere, normally next to a light source due to the fact that this is where they can catch their primary food source, namely small flies and the occasional moth. They are no trouble and pose no danger to us except by scaring the pants of a chap when one falls out of his box of Alpen and lands in his bowl when he's not yet had time to gather his thoughts!!! I liked that bowl as well!

Stingers

Unfortunately there are bucket loads of these chaps in the sea off Hua Hin. Shown above are two different models. A clear one (probably a moon jelly) and a brown one about the size of a dustbin lid. Luckily I know of a local beach which seems to be devoid of them.

Oiled to death

These luckless crabs are killed by placing them alive in fish oil until they drown! They are then eaten raw. I was advised not to eat any as my due to my western diet i may have problems. No need to tell me twice, their insides looked vile.

Spirit House

Now then the serious business of the 'Spirit House' These erections are not to be taken lightly. No sirree. They are everywhere and come in all shapes and sizes. They contain all manner of things from Toys, fruit, drink and flowers, whatever the chosen Deity desires. They are in every bar and building. They show a mark of respect to himself and all he stands for. Wobetide to anyone who mocks and bewails them.
A 'Wai' (sort of Buddha salute) must be given when passing on of these stations. The colours relate to a specific day of the week and a different Deity may be involved in a different Spirit House. Many of the Indian and Chinese gods are worshipped in Thailand.

Another Buddha day

Its a Buddha day! and by jiggery there will be a furious lighting of candles and head bobbing or he who must be obeyed will wreak furious anger upon all. Devotees light and prey with unparalleled devotion. Actually not being the slightest bit religious (burn in hell you heathen) Buddhism seems to make the most sense! They believe in Karma. What ye do unto others shall befall unto you. A good start if ever there was one. They also don't believe in one single Deity. Another good thing in my opinion. I may shave my head and become an orange draped disciple yet....... Yea right, bring on the next beer my good man.

Please release me

When the all seeing one requires it one must pay dutiful homage. Here a Thai girl 'Noi' preys before releasing two small nok (birds) in the hope that it will bring eternal health wealth and happiness. I hope it does.

5 baht food

Food cooks on a barbecue stall but no one pays attention as the show is on. This type of food is quite common around Thailand, sausages, fish balls (didn't know they had any?) chicken and pineapple are just a few of the things on offer. One skewer costs 5 baht which is about 6 pence.

He's behind you!

'He's behind you' - A Thai folk opera (Likay) hits town during a Buddha holiday. I couldn't understand a bloody word but the costumes looked rather nice.

Glimpse

The Thai national flag flies outside a local temple, framed by a window through which passers by get a tantalising glimpse inside.

Work arena

This is my work area from which I compose all my blog stuff and build the occasional web site. Note the fan, very important in the sweltering heat. The keyboard and screen are attached to my lap top to aid ease of use. In the foreground is my trusty 60gb ipod for essential listening whilst working. The ibook G4 belongs to a friend who sometimes comes over for file and music exchanges.
I probably spend 4 to 5 hours enjoyable hours every day sitting here.

Rented by Jesus

You would do well to utter a silent prayer upon boarding this (t)rusty steed! With it's one flat tyre and dubious looking strength. It must be at least 2030 years old, probably used by Jesus himself to pedal south for the sermon on the mount. Amazingly enough it still has it's original rider who is at least 1000 years older than the bike. That's what a diet of boiled rice and chicken liver's will do for you. Body and strength of a lithe 20 year old, brain and libido of a stuffed olive. Oh well you can't have it all.

Shiny station master

Hua Hin railway station where friends bid adieu and new ones arrive. Note the shiny bell which the shiny station master takes great pleasure in ringing as the train is about to depart. The station recently received a new lick of paint as noted dignitaries paid a visit.

Muttus Languid

'Ode to Muttus languid'

Hounds abound upon the ground,
mutts with nuts and cuts to butts,
moping, hoping, barely coping,
stacks of poo and fetid goo.

Eating, sleeping, rarely greeting,
reeking, leaking, seeking heating.
bleeding gums and sniffing bums,
howls, yowls and shitty bowels!

(Dave Wilson 2006)

Mafia involvement

A motorcycle taxi rider scans the rank board to see how long it will be before it is his turn for the next fare. Most ranks are run by local mafia who will take a percentage of the riders earnings for the privilege of him or her having their number on the board.

Jokers with guns!

Local mulisha share a joke whilst waiting for a green light on their high speed pursuit motorcycles!