Its Boxing day and by George its time for a bally good hunt. This apparently is what they call a 'mock hunt' as no fox will hopefully be worried to death in the process. Instead one of the disabled riders will have his or her horse confiscated, be made to don a yellow jump suit and ordered to limp off, only to be followed a few seconds later by the rest of the hunt armed with cudgels and screaming like banshees.
The whole affair has quite an eerie feel, as these middle England horsey types are rather a secretive inbred bunch who are rarely seen after dark and mumble in tongues.
It is mooted in hushed breaths that anyone who happens across one of their hobblings will never again sire a man child!
The hunt itself was roughly an equal mix of bi and quadruped forms. In some cases to be honest it was hard to tell the difference, but as a general rule of thumb I was informed if it shits on the ground its probably a horse.
After they had all emptied their bowels and wobbled off to cudgel the freak the rest of us retired to the warmth of the snug for a foaming pint of wallop and a damned good drubbing...!
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